If you read my blog with any regularity – or even just skip over what topics I cover – you’ll know that I’m a homemaker. You can also call me a house wife, I suppose, but the point is I stay home and take care of our animals and the house. I’ve been doing this for almost three years at this point, and I’ve definitely made some mistakes in that time.
I’ve been a homemaker as a full time job for almost three years now. During that time I’ve made many a mistake, but I’ve learnt from those mistakes and I think it’s high time I shared them with you! I’m still quite young to be a homemaker, but the story of how I became a homemaker is one for another time! Maybe that should be a post for next month?
Anyway, here are the mistakes I’ve made! I’m hoping that by sharing these with you it will make your own homemaking journey a little easier!
My biggest homemaking mistakes
Not having a routine
This has by far got to be the biggest mistake of them all. When I first started out, I was hearing a lot of “oh, you can do whatever you want whenever you want, you have all day!” You know what that mindset lead to? A whole lot of procrastinating and then rushing to get it all done before B got home and put the dinner on. I’m very glad this phase only lasted a couple months at most, I think I would have gone mad by now!
A lot of people think it’s easy peasy lemon squeezy, that you literally sit in front of the TV all morning in your PJ’s and do nothing. While there are days that I do that, they’re probably only once or twice a month at most! Taking care of animals, and managing a home – especially when B is a farmer – is a 7 days a week kind of job. You need a routine to make sure everything gets done, or you quickly become overwhelmed.
Not balancing your time
Very early on, there where days where I would spend 5-6 hours in the garden sorting out bits and bobs and seeing to the chickens, but not do anything in the house. Or there were days where I’d literally water and feed the chickens, and then spend hours upon hours doing the housework and cooking.
Not only is it mind numbingly boring to do the same chore for so long, but it also means there are days you don’t get to the necessary because you have to catch up on all the other bits. I now try to balance my days as much as possible, and do the necessary both inside and out before I start any little bits and bobs that should be done.
Ignoring the power of a to-do list
Ahhh to-do lists. Where would I be without one? I ignored them completely at first, I didn’t think they’d help any and I just got on with my mental list of what needed doing. This meant I forgot to get stuff out of the freezer, or forgot to do some other task that I was then annoyed about it not being done.
I now try to write myself a list every day. Even things that are daily tasks like feeding and watering the chickens goes down on the list. All necessary stuff is first, and then the lower down I get are the less important things. It’s incredibly satisfying to have everything on the list ticked off, but realistically that probably won’t happen. I pretty much always have one or two things that pass over to the next day, but that’s okay! As long as the necessary stuff is done, I’m happy.
Not expect any help
This is another big one, and should go for anyone who stays home whether you be a homemaker or stay at home mum or housewife. I used to do absolutely everything, and I mean everything. I didn’t expect any help whatsoever, mainly because I had been made to feel guilty for even thinking of asking B to do anything – not by B himself, by the way.
I get where the idea comes from, B goes to work every day and pays our bills, and I stay home and do nothing important, right? Wrong! If I were to do nothing at all, there would be absolute chaos! By “help”, I don’t mean asking B to do the washing up every night. I ask for help with the chickens, as there are jobs I need more than two hands do to, I also ask for help with taking the bins out – something that he does on his way to work – and mowing the lawn – since the lawnmower was a gift to him, and I don’t want the responsibility of breaking it!
Letting people judge, or taking their judgments to heart
When it comes to homemaking, or being a house wife or stay at home mum, there will always be people who don’t agree with it and try to force you into getting a job. Don’t let them! I’ve found the majority are jealous – precisely because they think you don’t do anything all day – and then there are people who simply don’t understand how your household works.
I know our lifestyle can seem very old fashioned, but the are reasons we live like this – again, for another post – and it works really well for us. I enjoy being able to dedicate myself to my family, being able to be there if someone needs help, and our animals are a lot happier when I can see to their needs straight away. B enjoys coming home to a nice warm house, with food and clean clothes ready for him after a hard day in the mud. It just works for us!
There you have it, some of my biggest mistakes! What are your opinions on homemaking? If you stay home yourself, what were your biggest mistakes?